crying...a lot

the last few days have been spent crying a ridiculous amount. i mean my baby is in the NICU and not at home with me, but i also just had a baby, so the hormones are like insane. i also don't feel the greatest. still having a lot of swelling, high blood pressure, headaches, etc. i just want to feel good.

BUT we have so much to look forward to.

hen will be back with us on saturday. thanks to my wonderful parents that have taken him and cared for him for 2 weeks. i can tell his stay is getting a little over welcome, he is getting a little bossy with nana. that can get scary!! mca and i miss him so much and i know having him with us will help ease this icky feeling of missing anthon. but thank you so much nana and papa for all you have done for him. it has been so reassuring to have him in one place and know he is happy and having a good time - even if he is calling the shots.

anthon is still doing awesome. he is having a little trouble digesting the breast milk, so they are working on getting some air out of his tummy. he is still on the CPAP - a machine that helps send in air for him to breathe (which is causing the extra tummy air). its so annoying though because if it isn't in his nose like perfectly, then his stats get all messed up and he doesn't get great blood gas tests. and the annoying thing is that the equipment is too big for him. they don't make the equipment small enough for a baby his age. however, that is the main population of humans that use it - preemie babies. so its is an oxymoron, but he seems to handle it well. i CANNOT wait until he gets it off so i can see his little face. today he is 28 weeks (which is what the NICU goes by so they can use a general language for babies his age). but saturday he will be 7 days old. and that is a big milestone. hopefully he will get moved from room 1 - which is the new baby room to room 2 which will be more comfortable to sit and spend more time.

we have also been trying to recruit a primary nurse. its this system they do where if a parent likes a nurse that has taken care of your baby, then you can ask them to be primary and they will be able to take care of your baby whenever they come into shift (at least that is how it is supposed to work). every nurse we have loved so far has a primary baby, so we are waiting to find someone to be the primary so we can make all these other nurses secondary. so essentially we could have like 6 or so nurses that always work with anthon - like a team sort of. mca has really been trying to recruit people. its so cute. he goes up to a nurse we like and says real quiet - looks around - hey, so do you have a primary. and the answer is always YES. ugh. but its cause they are so awesome they get snatched up real quick.

getting home yesterday was a nightmare - thus causing much of my breakdown. but this guy i am married to (i know, i already shouted out to him just a few days ago, but seriously if it weren't for him...state hospital here i come) ran around the house like a crazy person trying to make things comfortable for me. he won't even let me make my own ice water. now we are trying to get settled and have some countdowns to anthon's homecoming around the house. mca also made an awesome pumping station (picture to come) and a homemade commode (which is really more of joke than anything) so i don't have to walk upstairs all the time to use the bathroom.

this update was much longer than i thought. i guess i have lots on my mind. thanks for listening.

loves - the andersons